In My Professional Opinion

“There are some holes you can’t patch up, no matter how many stories you try to stitch them together with.” – Dr. Brown

In My Professional Opinion

A short story by Emma Lee Downs.

Summary: Dr. Brown psychologically analyzes one of her patients only to find that she is the one who needs to be analyzed.

Original Link 1: http://www.fictionpress.com/s/2860371/1/In_My_Professional_Opinion.

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In My Professional Opinion

By: Emma Lee Downs

“If there is nothing else productive you have to tell me, Mr. Williams, you are free to leave. You don’t have anything to worry about. You’re evaluation went well. I am going to give you a complete bill of mental health. I wish you a good rest of the afternoon.”

The woman in her early thirties tapped a clipboard with a stack of medical records clipped to it with a small, ballpoint pen. She sat on a leather chair with four round wheels at the bottom. Her patient lay across from her on a dark green couch. He had his arms pulled behind his head. His legs were crossed at the other end. He looked very comfortable on the green furniture piece, given the circumstances. At the end of every year, the patient in question, one Rowan Williams, had to visit a psychologist to make sure he was still mentally fit enough to keep his job. Some state governor long ago had decided that social workers needed to have a mental bill of health to provide the optimum services for their clients.

No one really took the state bill seriously. Most psychologists just hurried through the psyche evaluation and gave the workers a passing score whether they were actually mentally fit to keep their government positions or not. The social workers hated the mandatory meetings just as much as the physiologists who were paid by the city to evaluate them. Rowan Williams was different than the usual stock of men and woman that came in for the yearly evaluation. He lay on the green couch with a big smirk on his face. He had decided a while back that was going to make the most of his visit to the drab psychologist office on Winchester street whether his designated psychologist liked it or not. He looked up into the green eyes of the woman who had the aura of someone who had never smiled once in her entire life.

He said without blinking once, “Well Dr. Brown, I don’t think it is time for me to leave yet. I know that you have other patients to see and all, but I need someone to talk to, and seeing as I have to be here anyway, I might as well make the most of the situation.”

Dr. Brown sighed and proceeded to take a deep sip from a blue coffee cup. It was sitting on a silver tray that rested atop a brown end table. The end table was positioned next to her leather chair and was made of cherry wood. When she had taken a sufficient amount of the brown liquid into her mouth, she swallowed the thick syrupy liquid. She placed the coffee cup beside a pitcher of creamer and a dish filled with sugar that sat beside each other on the silver tray. She sat the clipboard in her lap and glared down at Mr. Williams with a look of annoyance.

“Mr. Williams, I have interviewed you for the last hour and I have found nothing out of place. You have many friends at your job that you talk to at a regular basis. You have a good relationship with your family and you visit them often. You are unmarried, but are satisfied living a bachelor life with your pet dog, Rex. You enjoy your job and have a good relationship with all of your supervisors. It seems like everything is going fine for you. In my professional opinion, you are the very vision of mental health.”

Rowan continued to look at the doctor with a large smirk on his face.

“Sure, things are going well for me, but what about you, Doc? It can’t be easy talking to people like me all day.”

Dr. Brown took another sip of her coffee. It was too late in the afternoon to be dealing with a difficult man like him, in her opinion.

She sat the blue coffee mug back on the tray and said, “I don’t know what you are driving at, but I am a very busy woman. I have other appointments to keep. I am only giving you half-hour to spit out whatever it is you feel you need to tell me. When the clock up there reaches 1:30 PM, you need to leave.”

Rowan began moving his feet together in a circular pattern. The coolness in her voice did little to shake him. He was resolved to say what he was going to say.

“I’m not driving at anything. I just want to know about your life, that’s all. You have to listen to people like me tell me about their lives all day. I just want to know about your life. It’s as simple as that.”

The doctor finished the last sip of her coffee and pushed the tray aside. Her annoyance with the man in front of her was growing.

“I would like to remind you that the city didn’t pay me to give you my life story. If you continue to bother me at my job after your thirty minutes are up, I will question that bill of heath I gave you and have you admitted into a group to work out your obvious need for attention. Now, I will ask you again, Mr. Williams, what exactly are you trying to get at?”

The doctor looked down at her patient through her black rimmed glasses and brought the clipboard up in anticipation. It almost looked like she was waiting for Rowan to divulge some dark secret he had been carrying around inside him for years. Of course, Rowan knew this wasn’t the case. It seemed to him that she was the type of woman that was too self absorbed to be all that interested in what he had to say. She was probably holding onto the clipboard to restrain herself from smacking him over the head with it. The type of look he was giving him led him to believe that, anyway. Rowan pulled his hands out from behind his head and used them to push himself up on the coach. He uncrossed his legs in the process as he found himself at eye level with the doctor.

“My god doc, have you been doing this so long that you forgot how to be human? You’ve got to have some story about your life that’s worth telling. My life isn’t all that exciting. You said it yourself, in so many words. I like hearing what other people have to say about their own lives. What’s wrong with asking a few questions, huh? That’s what social workers are supposed to do.”

Dr. Brown tapped her blue ballpoint pen against her clipboard again. She was becoming impatient.

“If I tell you something about my life, do you promise to leave me alone? I’m a very busy woman. I have things to do.”

Rowan’s smirk was replaced with a grin.

“Of course, I wouldn’t dream of keeping you all day Doc. Now, let’s set the mood, shall we? Why don’t you and I trade places? You can take the couch, and I’ll take the chair. It will be fun. It will be like…what’s what term you psychologists use? Oh yeah, it will be like we’re role-playing.”

Dr. Brown stopped tapping her pen against the clipboard placed two of her fingers on her forehead, while still holding onto the writing utensil. She started to rub her forehead with her thumb and forefinger as her other fingers continued to grip the pen.

“I’m not switching places with you, Mr. Williams. I’m, still the professional here.”

Rowan shrugged.

“Alright, whatever you say, Doc. Do what suits you. I just think you’d be more relaxed if you talked to me on the coach. That’s my ‘professional’ opinion.”

Dr. Brown stopped rubbing her forehead and looked at the annoying man sitting on the couch in front of her. The city didn’t pay her enough money to deal with this. She figured that the only way to get rid of him was to play along so she handed the clipboard and pen to him and stood up from her chair. She gestured for Rowan to sit in her place and he did quite hastily. She took his position on the green coach and frowned up at him.

“There, are you satisfied? I’m the patient and you are the doctor. Go ahead and ask your questions.”

Rowan held the clipboard over his head for a moment, like he had won the greatest trophy of the year. He brought it down and put the most serious expression he could manage on his face.

“Very well doctor, I will begin my evaluation. Let’s start with, um, all of the questions at once I guess. Just give me a short summary of your life from when you were a kid to now. Yes, a life story is a good place to start.”

Dr. Brown pursed her lips. Who did this upstart of a man think he was? She let her eyes fall on the green clock hanging on the wall. It was 1:10. She couldn’t believe that only ten minutes had passed. Was this the way all of her patients felt when she asked questions of them? She thought of revaluating the way she gave council to her patients if she managed to get the unfortunately meeting with the man sitting in her chair over with without completely losing her sanity.

She looked up at the brown haired man who was also in his early thirties. He was staring down at her with a serious expression, the same one she gave to most of her patients. It was a little intimidating. Did her stern expression make all of her patients feel the same way she was feeling now? She almost made her not want to tell Mr. Williams any of the important details of her life. Mr. Williams cleared his throat after she had been quit for some time and pointed at the clock on the far wall. Dr. Brown decided that she ought to say something to break the awkward silence between them.

She managed to spit out, “Well, if you really must know, Mr. Williams, I was orphaned as a young girl. My mother, father, and sister died in a fire. I was the only survivor. I was sent to live with my father’s brother, Charles. He made sure I was well taken care of. I went to school, made friends, dated some people when I got to high school, and had a pretty average life after that. I became a psychologist because my father was a psychologist. I always wanted to help people, just like he did. That’s what I do now. I’m carrying on the family legacy.”

Roman nodded a few times.

“Interesting, that’s very interesting. But do you like your job? I mean, do you really like it, or are you just helping people because it’s something your father would have wanted you to do? Why didn’t you go into your mother’s profession? Did you and your mother not get along?”

Dr. Brown stiffened her back. She wasn’t used to being asked these types of questions and it made her feel a bit uneasy.

She replied, “I wanted to become a psychologist to have a better understanding of what my father did. Now I realize what he had to sacrifice every day. It’s not easy listening to people that you can’t always help. It takes an emotional toll on you sometimes. Whether I like it or not is irrelevant. It is something my father would have liked me to do, so I decided to do it. My mom was a stay at home mother. She never wanted any other job than to take care of her children. I didn’t want that role. I wanted to be like my father. I wanted to be an important person.”

Rowan pretended to scribble some notes on some blank pages at the back of the clipboard.

“Hmmm, that is very interesting, doctor. So what you are telling me is that your mother was hindered by society’s stereotypes of what a woman should be and the only role model you had was a father that hated his own gender stereotype and was forced into a career he didn’t like to provide for his family. How did your sister feel about all this?”

Dr. Brown started twisting her hands together. Why was this man asking her so many personal questions? Why did it feel like they were all hitting so close to home? She decided to indulge him. She hoped he would leave if she provided him with enough information about her life.

She was curt and to the point when she said, “I really don’t know what you are talking about. This has nothing to do with perceived roles in society. I also don’t know why you’ve brought my sister into this. She was too young to make any rational decisions about what she wanted to be when she was older. I was thirteen years old and she was only four years old when she died in the fire. It’s hard to know what she would have thought about something like that at such a young age.”

Rowan kept scribbling pretend notes on the blank pages.

“Well doc, from what you have told me, I think that you are the one that needs the group therapy. You work at a job you do not enjoy because you think it somehow pleases your dead father and fills some gap in your tragic life. However, you can’t efficiently provide help to your patients because you still haven’t figured yourself out enough to help them with their own problems. Is this a correct analysis of your inner psychological battle?”

Dr. Brown started to sweat. This man was asking questions she really didn’t want to answer. This distressed her greatly. She looked over at the clock. It was 1:15. Only five minutes had passed! Why couldn’t it be 1:30? She knew she had to tell something to the man or he would never leave.

“Maybe that’s true, but that is life. We can’t all have your perfect situation, Mr. Williams. I am living my life the best way I know how. My Uncle was a school teacher and he always told me to study hard in school. He didn’t want me to end up like so many of the students he saw that dropped out, and ended up poor and destitute. He wanted me to have a future. So in part, I also went to school for him. He was the only other dad I knew. He was unmarried, and never took a wife. He didn’t have to be attached to things. I never married either. I never felt I had to be attached to things.”

Rowan stopped scribbling nonsense words in the back of the clipboard.

“In other words, you became the person your father and uncle wanted you to be as some kind of moralistic justification for what happened in the fire. You offer council to patients without really knowing how to fix your own problems. You don’t like your job, but you carry out your work anyway because that is what is expected of you. That’s what society wants you to be, so you comply with it, maybe because you are afraid more people will burn up in a fire if you try to deviate from the pattern and be yourself. Is this what you are telling me?”

Dr. Brown looked at the clock frantically. There was only ten minutes of the session left. She was turning very white. She had never been backed in a corner like this in a conversation by someone’s words before. She finally grabbed the clipboard and pen from Rowan’s hands and stood up from the couch. She pointed toward the oak door that led out of her office with a shaky finger.

“There are only ten minutes left, Mr. Williams. I’ve played along with your game and I have had enough of it. You need to leave now. I don’t have to answer any more of your questions. I am the doctor and you are the patient. I think anyone that takes the time to analyze a person as thoroughly as you have, obviously is trying to fill a void in his own life. Please take your leave right now! I won’t ask you again.”

Dr. Brown was surprised that she was physically shaking at her anger. Rowan calmly stood up from the chair and walked over to a coat rack that sat next to the door. He grabbed his hat and trench coat and opened the door. Before he left the office, he turned back to look at the doctor with one of his eyebrows raised.

“I’m guessing I’m the only person you’ve ever told all of this to. It’s too bad. I bet your patients wouldn’t have so many holes if you patched up some of them with your own stories. We’re all looking for ways to reach out to others and fill the void. I guess some people are too filled with holes to patch up the holes of others.”

The doctor didn’t know what to say as Rowan tipped his hat and softly closed the door behind him. She was left to stare at that door for a while, deeply engrossed in her thoughts. She was so engrossed that she almost missed her next appointment. The old man came in and sat in his usual place on the green coach. Dr. Brown wouldn’t have it. She decided to switch places with him. She had the old man asked some questions of her. She didn’t know why, but she felt that she had to reach out to the old man. She had to connect with him, the way Mr. Williams had tried to connect with her. She had to make up for the way she treated him, somehow.

The rest of the day, Dr. Brown interviewed her patients from the couch. It gave her a completely new perspective that she had never thought of before meeting Mr. Williams. She exchanged stories with many of her patients. She admitted privately that it was uncomfortable to have her patients ask her so many questions. She didn’t like being a psychologist when the patients were doing the psychoanalyzing.

What Mr. Williams said at their appointment stuck with her for an entire month. She couldn’t interview patients without thinking about the advice he had given her. Finally, at the beginning of the next month, she headed to the administrative building of the complex. She placed her resignation letter in the box outside her bosses’ office and walked to her apartment located a few blocks down the street.

A few weeks later, she got a letter in response. Her boss begged her to come back to the office but she had already made up her mind. It was time for a career change; she was ready for the next step forward in her life. She burned her boss’s letter in with an emergency candle she had found in one her kitchen drawers over an ashtray that sat on her kitchen counter. She watched each of the words melt under the pressure of the flame. Watching the letter burn gave her an odd sense of satisfaction. Finally after years of running from her past, she was able face up to the reality of the present. She was no longer afraid of the unexpected fires of her life.

Her boss, Dr. Ferhhenz, read her resignation letter over and over and still could not understand why one of his best psychologists had quit. The last line stuck out the most to him. For some reason, he couldn’t get it out of his mind. It read, “There are some holes you can’t patch up, no matter how many stories you try to stitch them together with.” He read this line for weeks on end. They made less sense each time he went over them with the paper in front of his face. The parting words of Dr. Brown hung suspended in his subconscious for many years, knotting in and out of his thoughts like misplaced thread.

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Time Travel and Energy Centers

Building The Machine

In my opinion, no matter how many gadgets you glue together to generate a light tunnel of time warping or whatever, there is no probable way of building a time machine, and especially one where you can type in a specific date to because the reversing of light particles does not follow a calendar or time schedule. However, there are energy centers of the earth that have a recorded history (so they say)  of sending people back in time, if only for a few hours.

Take for example in England, where a couple reporting staying in an inn that was run by a French couple in the countryside. They took pictures of the inn and everything; even the people that stayed there. When they went back to the inn to stay the next year, the inn was in ruins, the only evidence left behind was crumbled remains on the forest ground, and when they asked about the whereabouts of the inn, people told them that it hadn’t been in operation for a hundred years! Imagine that!

My Plan For Time Travel

In light of this revelation, I want to find an energy center that transports me to the ancient Persian Empire. I have this theory that, if you focus you Ki, or energy, into an energy center and picture a place in your mind, then you will be able to time travel without a a pimped out ride like in the movie, Back to the Future. It may seem crazy, but human beings are made of energy and are capable of manipulating it. There are many martial arts forms that teach this principle, including on of my favorites, Tai Chi.

Energy centers, or vortexes, are places where key lines, or energy lines of the earth meet and create a very powerful reaction. Some people say that the Bermuda Triangle is an energy center. This is not just a ‘New Age’ belief; it has been scientifically proven that the earth has energy centers and energy lines that migrate with the shifting of the plates, though no one is sure how they are generated or for what purpose they exist (though there are many theories).

Energy Centers Should Be Harnessed For Something More Productive

Anyway, the use of these energy centers seems to go to waste. A lot of them are in historic parks or ancient ruins, such as the ruins found in Sedona, and people use them for meditation purposes or whatever. If I ever get around to finding a energy center I am using it for time travel, baby!

Time travel can be a tricky thing, but I have always been ambitious about going back in time to ancient Persia, and living there as a citizen. On a side note, I also think energy centers could be used to teleport people to others areas of the world without the use of planes or boats. There are so many uses for energy centers that people have never thought of, but I bet if people opened their mind to the idea, the possibilities would be limitless!

What I Will Do When I Get There

I understand that I probably won’t bet he heroine of a legendary story if I end up going back in time, but it would be nice if I DID at the very least become familiar with the King of Persia, even if I just worked in his palace as a Mandarin. Heck, I would even settle being a merchant in the capital city if I were able to interact with the people and become a full Persian citizen!

So Why Persia?

Persia was one of the few empires of the ancient world where women were given the same status, if not more status, than the men. If I were to go back in time to say the Hittite Empire, I wouldn’t have any rights at all! I would be forced to marry at an early age and I could never leave the household without a male escort. However in Persia, I could get a merchant’s license on my own, and be free to walk the streets without a brother or other male family member following me around! I wouldn’t even have to get married, if I didn’t want to.

Also, not that it particularly matters, but the Persian royal family was said to be very generous to foreigners and willing to let them become Persian citizens just as long as they accepted the language, and cultural practices of the region. What a modern way of thinking! Persia I think was the best Empire of the ancient world, and rather than Greek or Roman Empires which fell because of the greed of its leaders, I think we should emulate Persia for it’s modern way of thinking and the freedom it gave to many people in a time period where the concept of freedom was not fully understood.

Wrapping It Up

In conclusion, time travel is possible but the ways that people time-travel in stories are just that; fictional ways of reaching our ancestors through ridiculous methods of attaching part B to art A of the ‘Time Flux Capacitor’. If we are to time travel, it will be exercising the use of earth energy centers through focusing devices or even our own energy! Wouldn’t that be a sight to behold?

About Me

Some facts about me.

Me In A Nutshell:

My name Emma Lee Downs and I am just another author struggling to make her way in the world. I write music on various instruments, draw, paint, sculpt, and of course, write.

Want to know more? Feel free to read my blog by following this link: https://emmaleedowns.wordpress.com/category/blog.

Currently I have a few different companies I operate online where I sell various craft, art, music, film, and writing projects. On some websites I list items for sell all of the time and on other websites I do not to keep the cost of the listing fees down.


Mountain High Crafters:

The main online company that I run is Mountain High Crafters where I list many different craft items for sell. I usually only list items that people are directly interested in buying at the time so a lot of the time the store will only have a few items listed or nothing listed at all if the listed items have already sold. The link to this craft company can be found here: http://mountainhighcrafters.ecrater.com.


Aluminum Fish Industries:

Another online company that I run through Etsy is called Aluminum Fish Industries. Much like Mountain High Crafters, I usually only list items that people are directly interested in buying at the time so a lot of the time the store will only have a few items listed or nothing listed at all if the listed items have already sold. The link to this craft company can be found here: http://www.etsy.com/shop/AluminumFishIND.


Art Stores:

The other online stores I operate are more about selling my word art, t-shirt designs, photography, and other visual art mediums. I sell a lot of my visual art through my deviantART store which can be found at this link: http://lyraalluse.deviantart.com/store. I sell some of my visual art pieces through my CafePress Store, Designs By Emma Lee, which can be found at this link: http://www.cafepress.com/designsbyemmalee. I sell many different designs, pictures, and word art through my Zazzle store, The Designs Shop, which can be found at this link: http://www.zazzle.com/thedesignzshop. Recently I have also started selling some of my photography and other visual art mediums through my RedBubble store which can be found at this link: http://www.redbubble.com/people/lyraalluse/shop.


Other Stores:

Any additional stores that I own can be found by following this link: https://emmaleedowns.wordpress.com/2013/10/20/my-stores.

Also, feel free to like the Facebook Page that links all of these stores together here: https://www.facebook.com/AluminumFishIndustries


Creative Projects:

Finally, I sell my writing and music through Lulu.com and CreateSpace. My Lulu.com account can be found here: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/EmmaLeeDowns. My Amazon Author Profile can be found here: http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B00JHRKZIE. My Goodreads Author Profile can be found here: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/13988965.Emma_Downs. The music I have published through CreateSpace can be found here: https://emmaleedowns.wordpress.com/2013/03/22/produced-music. The books I have published through CreateSpace can be sound here: https://emmaleedowns.wordpress.com/2013/03/21/published-work.


Contact Information:

If you are interested in purchasing any of my art pieces locally (here in Arizona) or having me list anything for sell on one of my craft or art websites feel free to message me here on my main website or contact me at hitomikanzaki34@hotmail.com.


Short Biography:

Hello all! My name is Emma Lee Downs (Better known as Lyra Alluse: my web mistress name), and I like…err…anything that isn’t trying to gnaw off my toes really. I have a very open mind and would classify myself as a people person. My interests include writing, drawing, painting, crafting, sword fighting, dagger combat, archery, oriental style combat, and any other art form or fighting style that you can think of. I also LOVE ANIME. My favorite genres are fantasy and Sci Fi, though I do like my adventure books and movies; especially when lots of things blow up! Oh; pretty colors!! lol I HATE the genre of ROMANCE and someday will dispose of it completely with the help of my cat who is after world domination. I like strange people… (I am weird myself ^_-) …and tend to like doing funny things.


Heroes:

Aslan, Batman, Spiderman, Nightcrawler, Rogue, Gambit, Emma Frost (Yes, Emma Frost IS an X-Men. Look Her up on Google…), Daredevil, Wolfwood, Vash the Stampede, Tamahome, Hotohori, Tasuke, Miaka, Van, Dryden, Hitomi, Keiichi Morisato, Belldandy, Urd, Skuld, Youko Nakajima (Twelve Kingdoms!), InuYasha, Kagome, Miroku, Sango, Gene Starwind, Jim Hawking, Jack Sparrow, The Doc (Back to the Future), C.S. Lewis, Albert Einstein, J.R.R. Tolkein, J.K. Rowling, Yoda, Rosa Parks, Amelia Earhart, Lucille Ball (I Love Lucy!), Steve Irwin, Yoko Kanno (Female Composer For Anime! Hell Yes!), Jessica, Vanessa, Pat, ALL Of My Friends (Everyone I didn’t mention but are loved just as much!), Rebecca (My Sis), My Family, Others.


Who I’d like to meet:

This is a serious list of the people that I want to meet in my life. No really, it is. I figure that this list has to be broken down into two sections; the imaginary people I want to meet (but unfortunately will never get to as they are made up) and the real people (like you) that I would like to meet.


Imaginary People:

Jack Sparrow from Pirates of the Caribbean and Doc from Back to the Future.


Real People:

Anyone who is as random, full of life and crazy as I am. Weird people are my favorite kind of people. Why? Because I am strange myself. But I love everyone. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone I didn’t like.

Well…accept maybe this telemarketer who kept calling and asking me to buy some kind of Internet service. He seriously called ten times! I finally got rid of him in a rather humorous way. It went more or less like this.

Andy (telemarketer dude): Can I interest you in this exciting new service?

Me: Hmm…service. Makes me think of bacon. Yummy bacon. Mmm mmm good. Do you like bacon?

Andy: I am not at liberty to discuss this ma’am.

Me: Ah come on. Can’t we discuss monkeys? Or pizza? I love pizza!

Andy: Well…about this product…

My sister (randomly pops in): My hair tastes like a skunk!

Andy: …

Me: I told you to wash it three days ago!

Andy: …AOL has a lot to offer…

Me: Does it do windows? Serious; you know how hard those things are to clean?

Andy: You know what ma’am, if you are not going to take this serious than neither am I.

Me: Serious? Who said anything about being serious? I want my car waxed dang it! Can you do that?

Andy: …I can see our service might not be right for you. Have a nice day ma’am. click.

My sister and I: laughing our asses off.

LOL So anyway…just as long as you are not a telemarketer we’ll get along great. Big grin.


What I’m doing with my life:

It was dawn; I was in my towel when the ninjas attacked. lol J/K Now on to the real story. I guess you could say I am an adventurer of sorts; I like to travel, camp, try new foods, and meet new people. Just call me ‘Emma Jones!’


I’m really good at:

I have extensive knowledge of all weapons and combat styles. I am handy at fixing things… (I am good with computers, software, and cars)…and I am good at creating anything I put my mind to. I even made a life size Darth Maul once! (I took it apart later after my sister complained that it looked too scary.)


The first things people usually notice about me:

People usually notice that I am very outgoing and friendly when they first meet me. The people that know me well say that I am weird, but in a good way. I have many friends and I love making more!


My favorite books, movies, music, and food:

Food:

I love potatoes! They are like my favorite food on the planet! I especially like mashed potatoes and twice-baked potatoes. I really love sushi as well, but it is kind of hard to get where I live, and when I can find it, it is usually expensive. I usually buy sushi as a treat for myself when I do well at something, since it is harder to get a hold of. I like hamburgers, but not as much as I like steak or other meats. I tend to like seafood a lot, especially shrimp. I could eat shrimp all day! However, seafood is also hard to get where I live because I live in the desert, so it is also a special food that I save for special occasions since it is expensive. I also like confections! I love cakes, cookies, and chocolates! I especially like little cakes that you can get at the grocery market and put in your lunch. I love chocolate in all of its forms, especially white chocolate. My favorite cookies are probably chocolate chip and peanut butter cookies.

I like candies from other parts of the world. I usually go to the World Market and get them because it is kind of a hobby of mine to try new foods. I also love tea! I love green tea, but since I am half-British, I tend to drink a lot of European teas. I love Irish breakfast tea, jasmine tea, rose hip tea, lemon tea, mint tea, and evening tea blends. I don’t really drink too much alcohol. I only really drink like once a year (that’s not an exaggeration lol). However, when I do drink, I like to have margaritas, red wine, or daiquiris. I like fruity alcoholic beverages, but I also like a European drink called ‘Mead’ which is made from fermented honey. It is just like drinking candy! It’s so good.

My favorite non-alcoholic drinks are orange soda, grape soda, strawberry soda, Sprite, Mountain Dew, iced-tea, cream soda, vanilla soda, grape juice, apple juice, fruit punch, and mixed coffee drinks. I don’t drink coffee as much as I drink tea, but when I do drink it, I like it to be blended. I love cappuccinos and other similar coffee drinks.


Celebrities:

Matsumoto Jun is my favorite actor of all time! Hayao Miyazaki is my favorite filmmaker of all time! Osama Tezuka is my favorite manga artist of all time! Fuyumi Ono is my favorite author of all time! Arashi is my favorite band of all time! Yoko Kanno is my favorite composer of all time! Ayumi Hamasaki is my favorite singer of all time! Yuu Watase is my favorite artist of all time!


Music:

I am third generation Norwegian, so I listen to a lot of Norwegian metal bands. One of my favorite Norwegian Metal bands is called ‘Moon Sorrow’. I just love the music! It is so haunting and mysterious. I also like a metal band called ‘Within Temptation’. ‘Within Temptation’ is a band is a band from the United Kingdom that one of my British cousins introduced me to and I ended up really liking it! I like a traditional Canadian folk singer named ‘Loreena Mckennitt’. I have one of her songs on my MySpace page. I also love the music of ‘Enya’. It’s so relaxing and inspiring! My favorite techno mixer is ‘DJ Sammy’, but I am also getting into a group called ‘Morandi’ which is a musical group from Romania. My favorite song by ‘Morandi’ is a song called “Angels.” It is very deep and touching. I especially like the video that goes with it.


Music (Simple):

I like Techno/ Dance, Celtic, Rock, Heavy Metal, Oldies (50’s, 60’s, 70’s and 80’s music), or anything that has a good beat and keeps my attention for more than 5 seconds.


Movies:

Holes, Serenity, Star Gate, Matrix Trilogy, Shanghai Noon, Shanghai Knights, Rush Hour (1 and 2), Back to the Future, Indiana Jones, Batman Begins, Batman Anthology, National Treasurer, Shrek (1 & 2), All Disney Films, All Pixar Films, Pirates of the Caribbean, Lord of the Rings Trilogy, Original Star Wars Trilogy, A Series of Unfortunate Events, Chronicles of Narnia: Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe, Spirited Away, Howl’s Moving Castle, Grave of the Fireflies, The Cat Returns, Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind, Laputa: Castle in the Sky, Porco Rosso, Kiki’s Delivery Service, Princess Mononoke, My Neighbor Totoro, Whispers of the Heart, All Studio Ghibli films, Others.


Television:

Teen Titans, Static Shock, X-Men Evolution, Batman Beyond, Batman: The Animated series, Superman: The Animated series, Justice League, Justice League Unlimited, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Firefly, Stargate SG-1, Farscape, CSI, Law and Order, South Park, Drawn Together, Family Guy, The Simpsons, Megas XLR, Samurai Jack, Avatar: The Last Airbender, Futurama, American Dad, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Robot Chicken, Keenan and Kel, The Adventures of Pete and Pete, Are You Afraid of the Dark?, Juniper Lee, Invader Zim, Fairly Odd Parents, Danny Phantom, SpongeBob SquarePants, My Life as a Teenage Robot, The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy, Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends, Courage the Cowardly Dog, Fushigi Yugi, Escaflowne, Twelve Kingdoms, Inu Yasha, Rurouni Kenshin, Slayers, Gundam Wing, Outlaw Star, Magic Knight Rayearth, El Hazard, Chobits, Case Closed, Ceres, Cowboy Bebop, DnAngel, Demon Hunter Yoko, FLCL, Fruits Basket, Kimba, Key the Metal Idol, Haibane Renmei, Weiss Kreuz, Little Prince, Lodoss War, Legend of Crystania, Magical Shopping, Arcade Abenobashi, Oh My Goddess, Orphen, RG Veda, Ranma 1/2, Steam Boy, Tenchi Muyo, Trigun, Utena, Vampire Hunter D, Witch Hunter Robin, Wolf’s Rain, Vampire Princess Miyu, Yu Yu Hakisho, Ai Yori Aoshi, Angel Links, Akira, Animatrix, Arc the Lad, Banner of the Stars, Berserk, Zatch Bell, Captain Harlock, Card Captor Sakura, Chinese Ghost Story, Crest of the Stars, Earthian, Kare Kano, Interstella 5555, Iria, Rounin Warriors, Last Exile, Love Hina, Metropolis, Nadesico, Nadia, Samurai 7, Samurai Champloo, Sorcerer Hunters, Those Who Hunt Elves, A Tree of Palme, Shamanic Princess, Others.


Asian Television Shows/ Movies:

My Lovely Sam Soon, Full House, Engine, Tokyo Juliet, Marmalade Boy, Mars, They Kiss Again, It Started With A Kiss, Itazura na Kiss, Tatta Hitotsu no Koi, Stand Up!!, Kurosagi, Snow Queen, The 1st Shop of Coffee Prince, Last Friends, Hotaru no Hikari, Liar Game 2, LIAR GAME, Great Teacher Onizuka: The Movie, You’re Beautiful, One Pound Gospel, Beautiful Life, Bara no nai Hanaya, Bambino!, Attention Please!, Atashinchi no Danshi, Anego, Tsubasa No Oreta Tenshitachi 2, Tsubasa no Oreta Tenshitachi, Dragon Zakura, Great Teacher Onizuka: TV Special, Great Teacher Onizuka, Gokusen 3, Gokusen 2, Gokusen, Akai Ito, Yamada Taro Monogatari, Proposal Daisakusen, Hello My Teacher, Nobuta wo Produce, Zettai Kareshi, Why Why Love, Nodame Cantabile, Hanazakari no Kimi Tachi E ~ikemen♂paradise~ (JP), Hana Kimi (TW), Devil Beside You, Kimi wa Petto, My Girl, Corner with Love, Meteor Shower, Meteor Garden II, Meteor Garden I, Boys Over Flowers: Final, Hana Yori Dango: Season 2, Hana Yori Dango, Boys Over Flowers, Others.


Books:

Wicked, The Giver, Number the Stars, Raptor Red, Harry Potter Series, Wheel of Time, Spiderwick, Ella Enchanted, The Dark is Rising Sequence, The Princess Bride, The Neverending Story, The Death Gate Cycle, Alice in Wonderland, Through the Looking Glass, The Chronicles of Narnia, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, The Hobbit, Dragon Knights, Escaflowne, Planet Ladder, Alice 19th, Ragnarok, Fushigi Yugi, Wish, Magic Knight Rayearth, DnAngel, Inu Yasha, Chobits, Others.


The six things I could never do without:

Well, it depends on the situation, really. But I guess in the general sense, I couldn’t live without…

1. Tea. I Am half-British, after all.

2. An internet connection. It’s the 21st century and I am enjoying every minute of it. I kind of wish we had flying cars though.

3. A goal of some kind. I am the type of person that needs goals in order to function. If I don’t have any goals, I make new ones, and go after them.

4. Travel. I want to travel all over the world and eventually I would like to live in Japan.

5. Food. I guess that is obvious as one would certainly die if they did not eat, but I am what you might call an appreciator of food. I believe food in all of its forms is good for the soul.

6. Creativity. Having the ability to create things is what makes me who I am. If I cannot create things, I feel that life is meaningless.


I spend a lot of time thinking about:

My life and how it will impact the lives of other people. I want to use my talents to give back to other people and make a difference in the world.


On a typical Friday night I am:

Out on the town, having a good time. Life is too short to just sit around and do nothing. I always have to keep myself busy with one thing or another.


The most private thing I’m willing to admit:

I have done and seen many amazing things in my life but I think the thing that touched me the most was something that happened when I donated my time to helping out at a local homeless shelter.

I took a bunch of homeless kids out to see a movie while their parents were looking for jobs and I asked each of them what they wanted Santa to bring them for Christmas. One of the kids said he wanted a fire truck. Another kid said she wanted a pony. The different gifts were listed off one by one.

Finally, there was one little girl left in the group. She had patiently waited for everyone to take their turn and now everyone was eagerly waiting for her response. After shyly twisting her hair with her fingers, the little girl said, “I wish I had a home.”

When I heard the little girl say that I realized how lucky I am to have the things I have in life and it opened my eyes to a way of viewing the world. Every time I think of that girl I am reminded of why I need to push myself to succeed; so I ultimately have the power to give back to others who are in need of my help.


Dress Style:

I like to wear jeans, shorts, and comfortable pants. I do not wear skirts or dresses; they make me feel weird and they do not go well with my tomboy image. I like wearing t-shirts, over-jackets, tank tops, hooded sweatshirts, and other shirts that are comfortable. I dress more for comfort than for fashion but I have been told that I have a good sense of fashion. A lot of my shirts have Legend Of Zelda game logos and other things I am interested in printed on them because I like showing people the things I am into through the things I wear. I usually keep my hair tied back in a ponytail but occasionally I let it down. I don’t wear jewelry or makeup. Both of these things make me feel too girly and uncomfortable. I like to just be myself and I feel that jewelry and makeup make me into something I am not. I basically dress for comfort and convenience but I also see it as a form of self-expression so that is why I advertise what I like by wearing certain t-shirts or tank tops.


Humor:

I have a very good sense of humor. Everything makes me laugh, and I am always making other people laugh with my jokes and facial expressions. I can be serious too, but most of the time I like to have fun and enjoy every minute of life. I believe that laughter is good for the soul, so it is good to do it often. Laughing also keeps you looking young so it is an all around good thing!


Traveled:

I had a traveling experience one year after I graduated from high school. I used to run a website called “The Escaflowne Grill” on MSN groups, which was a fan-based website dedicated to the anime “The Vision of Escaflowne.” I met a guy named Alpha Shero (his web name) and we ended up becoming friends since he also had an Escaflowne group. Eventually, I visited his family in Canada and he visited my family in the United States. It was a really great experience! We are still friends and talk over the messenger and on an online game called Maple Story. I hope that I can make more friends like Shero by using this website. I have also traveled all over the United States. My favorite State is probably Maine because it is next to the ocean and you can get the best seafood there. One day, I would like to visit Japan and Korea. My ultimate goal is to live in Japan because I feel a real connection with the people that live there and the culture. I would also like to visit the UK, since a lot of my family members still live there. Norway would also be a destination I would be interested in traveling to, since it is the country that my family originated from.


Cultural Adaption:

I am very adaptive to having a partner from another culture. This might sound strange, but in my heart, I have always felt a strange connection to Japan and Korea. I would love to live in one of these countries one day.